Last week, I met my neighbor friend Renee for breakfast, and at one point in our conversation she asked about my intentions for 2015, which I had written about here. Still not entirely comfortable (or articulate) talking about this kind of thing out loud, I babbled on for a few minutes without saying anything concrete. She went on to talk a little bit about her own intentions and how she was applying them to different areas of her life in a very reasonable, smart way, and it occurred to me that I probably should put a little more thought into how my own intentions were going to be brought to life.
It was one of those moments of clarity—like hello, how will you know you're heading in the direction you want to be for the year unless you turn those words into actions? My writer brain understands it this way: There can't be any character development if there isn't any plot. Obvious, yes, but I've been away from self-help/personal development for a while now and kind of forgot how things work.
My words—rooted, awake, and unapologetic—represent the way I want to feel. It's more of a centered sense of being that I'm seeking, a mindset, rather than something that can be fulfilled by checking tasks off a list. I think about a lot of people that I admire and how they have a steadiness of character and an inherent confidence that I aspire to. It's an aura, not necessarily what they do.
But don't we demonstrate who we are—to ourselves and others—through our actions, in addition to our state of mind? These words will mean nothing to me if I'm not expressing my values. It now seems silly to me to pick a word like rooted and then to just float around waiting for the word to make its appearance in my life. That sounds like a perfect recipe for failure, and quite the opposite idea to being rooted.
A few days ago, I watched Jess Lively's intention setting miniseries (now unavailable, but she is launching her Life with Intention course, which sounds amazing). The miniseries was a short introduction to her philosophy of values-based intentions. She confesses that she spent a lot of time chasing goals and in the pursuit of "success" but never feeling truly fulfilled, even after achieving her goals. Jess advocates a switch to values-based intentions instead, where our values drive our actions. When we live from our values, we have a deeper sense of meaning and connection to how we are living. And her approach sounded perfect for me, both in terms of my words for the year, and also putting a focus on how these intentions will be integrated into my life through action.
So I took to my journal and started to flesh out my intentions in clearer terms. My approach varies slightly from what Jess demonstrated in the miniseries, but I think this is a good starting point. I've shared my ideas below for three different areas of my life, if you're interested in seeing how I'm breaking the process down.
How can I be rooted, awake, and unapologetic in my body?
- Practicing yoga, especially grounding poses and poses for the root and sacral chakras
- Walking, hiking, spending time in nature, stretching, working on core exercises
- Taking periodic mediation breaks or mindfulness check-ins throughout my work day
- Taking breaks for deep breathing and stretching during my work day
- Mindfully eating earthy and nourishing foods, and paying attention to how different foods affect me
- Being aware of negative self-talk towards my body
How can I be rooted, awake, and unapologetic in my mind?
- Being intentional about the media I choose to consume
- Pursuing learning and growth opportunities
- Taking mindfulness and meditation breaks during my work day
- Journaling, bloging, writing, and writing some more
- Reading, and taking the time to reflect on what I'm reading and how it affects and changes me
- Being aware of negative self-talk towards myself and my abilities
How can I be rooted, awake, and unapologetic in my relationships?
- Being the person that shows up
- Reaching out more; expressing when I need support
- Bringing my true self to others: do not shrink, make comparisons, or try to people-please
- Saying what's on my mind
- Saying "no" when necessary, when it means I'm putting self-care first
- Being fully present when I'm with others
- Volunteering for a worthy cause
- Being open in intimate, heart-centered situations
- Asking questions, listening, and starting conversations that matter
- Edited to add: Avoiding backtracking when feeling vulnerable
Honestly, many of these actions do not vary greatly from my 2015 vision board; I sometimes need to process concepts both visually and verbally before they really sink in, especially since I am making a stronger connection between intentions and action. I'd like to return to the practice of checking in with my progress on a monthly basis, or at least quarterly, which I might share on the blog if it's not too personal.
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